


I Wish We Could Go Back (and Remember What We Were Fighting For)

by carnivaldreams



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - No Arrow, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-12-07
Updated: 2015-04-17
Packaged: 2018-02-28 12:20:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,160
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2732309
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/carnivaldreams/pseuds/carnivaldreams
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For five years Felicity Smoak had been busy building her life in Central City. She had a job she was great at, she had friends that she loved, and she was happy; then with one phone call she was drawn back into her past and not allowed to hide from it anymore.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Title from Taylor Swift's "I Wish You Would"

When Felicity was in the middle of a project on her computer, she wasn’t always aware of her surroundings. Takeout from Big Belly Burger would sit half eaten at the edge of her desk, the espresso at the top of her keyboard half drunk and cold, at least until she would lift the mug up to her lips and grimace in disgust at the cold liquid, taking a small break to the coffee machine and back. People would come and go, and she would later have no recollection of their conversations at all. 

Her cell ringing had been background noise, a disturbance in the back of her brain until just before the tune faded off and her voicemail picked it up; something connected in her brain, and she lifted the screen to her ear. " This is Felicity Smoak,” she answered the unfamiliar number, cradling the phone between her ear and shoulder, and continued typing determined to not lose her concentration. 

“This is Jennifer Page, I’m calling from Starling General. Oliver Queen was admitted last night…” 

“I’m sorry, you must have the wrong number.” She hadn’t thought about Oliver Queen in years, hadn’t seen him in even longer, not since she graduated MIT and moved to Central City.

"I’m sorry Ms Smoak, you’re listed as his emergency contact, there’s obviously been a misund…”

“I have’t spoken to Oliver Queen in over five years Ms Page,” Felicity leant back in her chair, finally turning her whole attention to the conversation. “Why would he have me listed as his emergency contact?”

There was a pause on the other end, and Felicity heard the sound of paper rustling and a nervous coughing, as if the woman didn’t want to keep talking. 

“Well, it says you’re his wife.”

Felicity closed her eyes and counted down silently to calm herself down again. After she hung up the phone, thought of her project were long abandoned, the files saved and her computer shut down as she walked out the office in a daze. 

Once the initial shock had worn off, anger settled in; she remembered being Oliver’s wife, when she was living in Massachusetts and fueling herself on caffeine to get through the final year of her degree. She had been in love, admittedly crazy, and they’d married in Las Vegas after one long sleepless weekend.

Six weeks after her graduation she’d left the divorce paper on the kitchen counter as she walked out, their final fight her breaking point. She had been determined to move on with her life that she hadn’t followed up to make sure that she was actually divorced.

_Why hadn’t she followed up on her freaking divorce?_

That evening she was on the overnight train to Starling City, her computer bag and one small weekend bag thrown over a shoulder. She hadn’t told her friends that she was leaving town, let alone the reason why; only her boss knew that she needed a week off work to go out of town on a personal matter.

She didn’t know what Oliver had done to wind up in the hospital, he had always been a little reckless and loved riding around Boston on his bike, so she could make some guesses, but for the nurse to call her, it had to have been pretty bad. Did his family even know what had happened? She couldn’t be the one to call them and explain that a complete stranger from out of town had been informed of their sons accident before them. She had only met his sister, once, when she had come out to visit with Oliver for a week during her summer holidays; that was pre-Vegas trip.

Would she had to explain this to a girlfriend as well? Felicity burrowed her head into her hands and groaned, barely stifling the urge to scream. Why was she even on her way to Stirling, when she could have sealed with this situation with a phone call and her lawyer? (her friends kept telling her she was too nice)

It was a long, monotonous ride into the city, Felicity unable to sleep upright, especially between the quiet humming on the train and her mind trying to process her situation. The early morning sun was glaring right into the window as Felicity blearily gathered up her belongings as the pa system crackled to life announcing their imminent arrival into Starling City.

*

Foregoing the appeal of the hotel, with it’s soft bed and hot shower, she made a direct line to the hospital before she could lose the last of the drive that had compelled her 600 miles away from home. She followed the directions a nurse at the main desk had provided her with, and knocked softly on the partially opened door, before stepping into the private room, a quick gasp escaping through her lips. Oliver was lying there in the middle of the bed, one side of his face bruised, and his left in a cast. His eyes were closed and she took a couple of steps closer towards the bed, noticing that even in sleep he looked in pain.

“Who are you?” A voice behind Felicity startled her, and she spun around, remembering her bags were still over her shoulder as they knocked against her back, to stare in shocker at the older, immaculately dressed woman, glaring at her. “What are you doing in my son’s room?” She demanded. 

Felicity’s mouth opened, but no words came out. 

“Security!” The woman called back through the open door. “Security!”

“I’m…I’m Felicity,” She managed to keep her voice calm and steady. “The hospital called me yesterday afternoon.”

“That’s ridiculous, who would…”

“I’m his wife.”

The words still sounded ridiculous.

It was Mrs. Queen’s turn to stare at her in shock, obviously Oliver hadn’t explained all he had gotten up to while he was at Harvard. 

The stare off between the two woman was disrupted by the sounds of movement behind Felicity, and she turned back to the bed just in time to see Oliver open his eyes slightly, wincing in pain. 

“‘Licity?”

“You know her?” His mother still sounded dubious. 

The tilt of his head was all he could manage of a nod. “What’re you doing here?”

“She claim she’s your wife,” Mrs Queen answered before Felicity could even open her mouth. 

“I left you the divorce papers, Oliver.” Felicity reminded him as his eyes fell closed again.

The doctor chose that opportunity to come and check on Oliver, Moira taking the opportunity to unceremoniously throw Felicity from the room, who gladly take the chance to race back to her hotel. 

She stood under the pressure of the shower she’d started fantasising about hours ago, the hot water cascading down her back as she tried to relax after the last fourteen odd hours. She pressed her forehead against the wall and reminded herself for the dozenth time that she was completely crazy. 

She needed to go back to the hospital, and talk to Oliver. She needed the divorce she’d asked for five years ago, she needed to make sure that he was okay.

She should have known that nothing with Oliver was easy.

_Her wardrobe was emptied on the bed in the middle of their small bedroom, and Felicity was slowly and methodically folding everything up and packing them into the two suitcases that lay on the floor behind her. Her vision was blurry, and her eyes bloodshot and red, but she refused to again give into the tears. She had watched her mother cry over men her whole childhood, and she refused to break the promise her thirteen year old self had sworn about never crying because of a man._

_Her eyes flickered to her phone she’d left on the nightstand table, and she fought the urge to pick it up again to check the time or for messages. The last time she had looked it had been quarter to midnight, and after two voicemails left on Oliver’s phone she wasn’t leaving another one. She had left all she wanted to stay._

_Their arguments all sounded the same, the repetitiveness of it like running around in circles. They’d made a mistake, marrying too young, and now it was obvious that they wanted two very different things in life. Felicity wasn’t going to wait around for Oliver, if all he wanted to do was party and drink._


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "She was no longer his, and he was no longer hers, and she couldn’t touch him just because she wanted to feel the roughness against her skin."

 

When Felicity first moved to Central City, all reminders of Oliver; photos, her wedding ring, had been packed away into a small wooden box, that had been stored right at the back of her closet, behind all the spare bedsheets she went out and bought in the spirit of responsibility which had been collecting dust ever since. She had celebrated the event with a bottle of her favourite wine.  She’d thought about him a lot at first, everything triggering some sort of memory; the memory of his smile, his scent, the way he’d look at her when he thought she wasn’t paying attention, and it hurt. She had loved him, but it wasn’t enough for her to stay with him while he was on a path of self-destruction. It was only as time passed and she made friends, and created a life in Central that she began to think about him less and less.

Sitting cross legged on her hotel bed, in her pyjamas and an old MIT hoodie, after a nap, despite the fact that it was barely afternoon, she stared at her phone screen, subconsciously biting down on the nail on her thumb. She had forgotten about her weekly brunch date with her friends through all the excitement, and now Caitlin was demanding to know what had been important enough to make her forget about the long standing tradition.  _Last_ _minute trip out of town._ Her thumbs flew across the screen, tapping out the message. _Should be back next week._

_Should???_ Came back a very quick reply.

She wasn’t going to explain her marriage, not until she had a solution for the over-curious minds that would be waiting. At least it shouldn’t take long; she had been doing research on her computer, and from what she could understand, it should just be a matter of signing (resigning) a couple of papers and presenting them to a judge.  

She wanted to stay in her pyjamas for the rest of the day, order room service and nap, ignoring every responsibility; but she knew that she should go talk to Oliver again now that she was feeling human again. She flung backwards, closing her eyes as her head hit the pillow, and tried to imagine herself somewhere, anywhere, that wasn’t Starling. 

Several hours later, when she went back into the hospital, it was only after the repeated assurances of the nurse on the phone, that Moira Queen had definitely left for the day. She smiled at the staff she saw and she approached his door slowly, knocking slightly before slipping through. His eyes were closed again, and Felicity curled up in the chair next to his bed. Her eyes slowly tracked from his feet to his head, cataloguing the injuries more thoroughly, wondering if there was more underneath the thin hospital robe and blanket. She studied his face closely as she took in the darkening bruise covering most of his cheek. He looked older, sharper, his hair cut short, the stubble covering his chin and neck no longer shaven clean every morning. Her fingers hovered at the edge of his bed, fighting the urge to brush the facial hair against her fingers, something that she had done before, in the early morning hours when neither of them had quite completely woken up yet, and they were all alone in their little world. 

She was no longer his, and he was no longer hers, and she couldn’t touch him just because she wanted to feel the roughness against her skin.

“‘Lis?” His eyes fluttered, and his lips barely moved, her old nickname coming out in a whispered murmur. “You’re here?” Felicity wanted to be mad at him, she had every right right to be mad at him, she _was_ so mad at him, but he looked so vulnerable lying there on the bed, such a strange position for Oliver Queen to ever be in, that she couldn’t demand him sign the papers and make a dramatic exit like she had been imagining.   
“Of course I’m here,” Felicity settled back into the chair, her voice soft. “I was more than a little surprised when I got a call from the hospital.”

“Sorry.”

“What happened?” She had been plagued by different versions of what might have happened, each one growing worse than the last; she had an active imagination. 

“I came off the bike,” the words came so casually off the tip of his tongue that Felicity had to wonder how many times he’d explained this in the past. He had never been a careful person, especially when it came to open roads and his bike. “I’ll be good in day or so.” She severely doubted it, watching him to try to move around. 

“What did you do the papers Oliver?” It was like ripping a band aid off, the longer she sat on the question, trying to find a way to ask him, the worse it was going to be in the end. She didn’t want to sit around in a hospital room, in Starling, waiting for him to recover.

His eyes darkened for a moment, a memory flashing through his imagination, and a small cruel smirk formed on his lips. “I burnt them.”

“You WHAT?” She hadn’t meant to yell the words, and when a nurse came rushing through the door a moment later she found the two in a tense stand off. 

“I was angry, I was drunk, and I burnt them.” Oliver repeated.

Felicity pushed herself off out of the chair, her anger strongly renewed. “Who lets someone believe they’ve been divorce for five years?”

"Who the hell walks out in the middle of the night?”

Felicity thought about what she could throw at him, verbally and literally, remembered she was in a hospital and thought against it; she went to storm out, she could serve him with divorce papers through a lawyer once she was back home, to be face to face with Moira Queen again. Instinctively, she took a step back. 

“Ms. Smoak,” the older woman’s smile was thin and insincere. “How wonderful to see you again.”

"I was just leaving,” she glared at Oliver again over her shoulder. “I’ll have a lawyer send over the papers.”

“No.” That word from the woman’s mouth stopped Felicity dead in her tracks, one foot already halfway out the door. She turned around slowly, sure she had been hearing things. 

“Excuse me?”

“The family, Oliver, needs some good publicity in this city. You are that good publicity.”

“What good does it do me?” Felicity frowned. “I have a life I need to get back to.” She took another step out the door, already planning on buying a ticket for the next train out of the city.

Moira went on as if she hadn’t heard Felicity. “You will help my son recover from this accident, you will smile and be happy, you will reconcile this separation. Six more months of marriage won’t hurt you, and then I’ll be happy to step aside and allow your divorce.”

“No,” Felicity forcefully repeated. “You are crazy, that plan is insane. I’m not staying here, I’m not helping Oliver. I am going home.”

_“Too early,” Felicity moaned, the alarm on Oliver’s phone a shrill cut through the peaceful quiet. She struggled to pull the quilt covering the both of them over her head to cut out the noise and the light. “Let’s go back to sleep.” She suggested. Oliver’s laugh was gentle and soft, and he pulled the cover back down off her head, rolling on to his side to kiss her cheek._

_“We need to get up,” he pushed himself up onto an elbow, leaning over to kiss her again, their lips barely touching, as Felicity tried to pull him in closer. “You have class soon.”_

_“You and me, no one else.” Felicity wrapped her arms around his neck. “Just for today. This can be our honeymoon,” she quirked one eyebrow up in an invitation. “Think of the fun we can have.”_

_"You’re going to kill me Felicity,” he settled back down into the pillows, pulling her close to nuzzle her neck. “You and me.”_

 

 

 

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

Felicity had been naive to believe that her defiant stand against Moira Queen had been the end of that discussion; that she would be allowed to move on with her life with this only being a minor bump in the road. She had walked out of the hospital room, and booked herself a ticket on the next train back to Central City. She had been planning on calling her lawyer from her office the next day, before she had been called into the boss’s office before she’d even been able to sign on to the network. 

Sitting there, it was as if time had stopped, the words coming from her boss becoming a distracting and unintelligible buzz in the background, while she stared at him disbelievingly having trouble processing what he was telling her. She had been requested to head a project in their head offices, in Starling City.

“This…This is because of Moira Queen isn’t it?” She choked the words out. She hadn’t even met this woman a week ago, and now she was actively working to destroy her life. “How is she doing this? Is it the money?” 

“You’re the best this company has Ms. Smoak,” she could believe that. “It’s important that you run this from Starling…” That she had more trouble believing. 

“Is…is there any way I can get myself out of going?” 

A shrug and an apologetic grimace. “Short of quitting…No. You’ll be required in Starling by the end of the week. HR will help you arrange all the necessities.”

She stalked out of the office, a quick detour to grab her bag, and was out of the building before it was even ten in the morning. Walking through the city, strangely quiet now that the morning rush had died away, she fantasised about the idea of quitting, and refusing to play Moira Queen’s twisted game. She didn’t want to let her win though, she didn’t _want_ to quit a job that she loved, and was great at. She was on auto pilot as she walked into Jitters, ordering her regular non fat latte before collapsing into a recently vacated arm chair, sinking into the soft cushions. _She was still married._  Her fingers slowly massaged her temple, trying to stop the headache she could already feel forming; the concept was still strange, even after time to process it. Her former plan on sending the necessary papers and ignoring it any further had obviously been derailed, and no matter her opinion on the matter she was going to have to be Mrs. Felicity Queen for a little while longer. She didn’t even know Oliver’s opinion on this whole mess, their single conversation very short while he had remained dosed up on pain medication.

She took several deep gulps of her coffee, the smell of caffeine soothing her frazzled nerves, before she pulled her laptop out of her bag and connected to the cafe’s wifi. Her fingers hesitated over the keyboard before she typed in a Google search on Oliver; did she really want to open Pandora's box? The articles that quickly began to appear ranged from bar fights to motorcycle accidents, and there was several gossip sites that detailed his drunken affairs - she didn’t open those links up. He was on a reckless, destructive path that she was apparently meant to help repair according to his mother.  There was an article about a club opening that Oliver owned, and was doing well as the premiere spot in Starling City night life. He had managed a bar when Felicity first met him, and he had enjoyed it, enjoyed the people and enjoyed the challenge, and despite all her other doubts it was reassuring to Felicity that _her_ Oliver hadn’t completely disappeared. Hopefully. 

“Felicity?” She was jerked away from her reading and looked up at Barry standing right in front of her, confusion and concern colouring his face. “It’s ten thirty, what are you doing in here? Why aren’t you at work?” He sat down opposite her, his own coffee in a to go cup, in his hands. “Where did you go on the weekend?” He asked after a brief pause. “You never disappear like that.”

“I stormed out of work this morning after a…disagreement,” She struggled to find a word for the ultimatum. “I just needed to cool down for a moment. There was a personal emergency over the weekend that I had to go take care of.” 

“Is everything all right? Is it your mum?”

“My mum’s fine, nothing ever bothers her. Uh…but there is something. Maybe I should wait until this afternoon when Cait and Cisco can be here too, this is going to be hard enough to say once.”

Barry shook his head, “you don’t get to say that and then drop the subject Smoak. Are you sick?” 

“No…NO.” Felicity promised him.”We can go meet them for lunch if you don’t want to wait. Work can wait for a day.”

As they walked through the streets of Central City, towards S.T.A.R labs, Barry kept side eyeing Felicity, the concern and worry never leaving his face. He texted the other two and told them to meet him and Felicity and the sandwich place around the corner.

“I’m married.” Felicity couldn’t handle the concerned faces anymore, and once the four of them had found their seats and before they could take their first bites of lunch, she blurted it out. “Five years ago I left him and stupidly thought that he had signed and filed the papers I had left behind, and never actually double checked.”

Caitlin, Barry and Cisco had frozen, their faces would be comical if this was any other discussion. “That was my emergency this weekend, he ended up in the hospital. Now his family want me to go down there and play happy family before they’ll let this divorce happen.” Now that she had made it through the initial confession the rest came pouring out of her mouth. “I’ve been transferred to Starling City apparently, they told me this morning.”

The three of them remained frozen, and the longer they stared at her, the more compelled Felicity was to keep talking. She opened her mouth again, but this time Caitlin beat her to it. “You’re leaving?” Her sandwich lay forgotten on the table. 

“I’m not going that far, I promise. It’s not like I’m leaving you guys for good. I’ll be back to visit, and then in six months I’ll be back and we can all pretend like this never happened.” That was her plan, anyway. 

“Refuse to go,” Cisco spoke up. “What’s the worst that can happen if you refuse to conform?” 

“They’ll fire me,” Felicity answered. “His moth…my mother-in-law, she’s a powerful woman; and this is what she wants. I’ve already fought her over this and this is how she’s playing. I’m not going to win.”

“That sucks,” Cisco voiced what they were all thinking. 

“When do you need to leave?” Barry asked after they’d all had a minute.

“Before this weekend,” Felicity frowned. “I’ll get through this, and everything is going to be okay,”

**

With half her apartment already in cardboard boxes, Felicity slumped against the back of her couch with a wine glass in one hand and her TV remote in the other, channel surfing for anything to take her mind off reality.

She had found an old repeat of a medical drama and was just getting into it, when her ringtone jarred her, an unfamiliar number on the display, _Starling City_ displayed underneath; she answered with a heavy sigh. 

“Felicity?” Oliver’s voice was firm in her ear.

“Oliver. I wasn’t expecting you to call me.”

“I know, I wanted to talk to you…” “Before your mother’s enforced return date? I know it’s her who’s puppeteering this whole thing.”

“I am sorry about that,” he didn’t deny the accusation. “I know you never wanted to hear from me again. I know I screwed up with the…”

“It’s happened,” Felicity cut him off, trying to adopt a casual nonchalant attitude about it. “We’ll move on.”

“It will be good to see you again,” he admitted. “Waking up and seeing you in that hospital room, it was something I never would have expected to happen.” 

Felicity bit back a number of remarks; they needed to come to a detente quickly for this to work out. 

“…I have someone at my door.” Felicity stammered out the excuse quickly “I’ll see you in a couple of days Oliver,” and then hung up the phone and let her head fall back on the couch cushion. They needed a truce, but this wasn’t going to come easy. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I made it through the curse of writing Chapter Three, even though it took some time. I'm sorry, all!!!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> To apologise for the month wait, I have the new chapter ready to post a couple of days early.

For the last hour on the train, Felicity couldn’t take the eyes of the ring she’d pulled out of its place in her handbag, its weight in her palm growing heavier and heavier with each passing minute. When Oliver had slid it onto her finger in that small chapel they’d found one late night after a disastrous family dinner, she loved it instantly, and in the months that had followed loathed the times that she’d been forced to take it off. For the last five years though, it had been hidden in a box in the back of her closet, where she’d tried to keep it out of mind. 

Would she be expected to be wearing the ring by the time the train arrived at the station? She held it over the tip of a freshly painted fingernail; she didn’t know if she could even manage to slide it on again with all the promises and memories that the small diamond ring held. She played with it for a couple more minutes, the ring never falling further than the purple coloured nail, before securing it back in an inside pocket of her bag. 

Her goodbyes with the others had been made at Central City’s train station, loud and teary during the middle of rush hour, with plenty of promises of weekend visits; her dim reflection in the windows showed that her eyes were still puffy and red behind her glasses. She reached for a face wipe in her carry on bag. She couldn’t remember a time in her life when everything hadn’t been completely organised and detailed; the order bringing a calm and stability to her life that her childhood had lacked. It was only at MIT that her order had been destroyed by Oliver,the bar managering, motorcycle wearing ‘dangerous’ boy that her friends had warned her about; and after all the time spent repairing that order post-Oliver, he was about to completely destroy it again. 

The intercom system above her crackled slowly to life, the conductor she’d seen briefly once or twice during the long ride announcing that there was still one more station before Starling City’s final destination, before it died back down again and Felicity resettled herself with her tablet in her hand as others around her began to stir, preparing to depart. 

_“Are we really doing this?” Felicity giggled as they sat together in one of the back pews of the late night chapel they’d found; watching the people before them in line repeat their vows. “I mean this is so cliche… it’s so cheesy.”_

_“Do you want to wait? We can do this properly back in Boston.” Oliver lifted her hand, ready to pull her back out into the bright light and noises of Sin City, his voice filled with mirth though because they were both as excited as the other, and Felicity didn’t want to wait any longer._

_“No,” Felicity laughed, and Oliver smiled even more at the light sound. “No. I don’t want to wait any longer. You and I are going to become a family, that’s all I want.”_

The conductor’s voice came over the speakers again, announcing their imminent arrival into Starling, drawing her out of the light restless sleep she had fallen in to, the gentle rocking and humming of the carriage and engine drawing her into it’s trap. Shaking off the last vestiges of fatigue and the memory-filled dream that she refused to let shake her, she slowly began to gather her bags and make her way to the doors, ready to make as fast an exit as possible.

Nightfall had settled into the city by the time Felicity made into the station with her freshly claimed suitcases; travellers settling in for a long night before early morning departures, or making their way slowly to the last trains for the night, large coffees clutched between their hands to keep them awake for that little while longer. Felicity envied them as she stifled a yawn behind the back of a hand. Someone from her company was meant to be greeting her at the station, and she hoped that they’d been informed of the slight delay in her arrival, all she desperately wanted was a warm bed to curl up in. 

“Felicity, Felicity.” Her name was called across the station, and she tried to recover from the falter in her step as quickly as possible. She had been expecting a representative to come and greet her, help her get settled in before the truths of her move were faced, but apparently the plan was to throw her in the deep end head first. 

“Oliver,” Her voice was only a little shaky as she managed a smile. Concern quickly covering any hesitation in her features as she took in the still obvious bruises and the crutches he leant heavily on to walk. “You shouldn’t have come out, you need to be in bed. Should you even be out of the hospital?” 

“I thought it might be easier for you if you had a familiar face here. Even if it is me.” He gestured at her carry on bag, and won the silent war of wills, sliding it over his good shoulder. 

For once at a loss for words, all Felicity could do was nod as they walked silently out of the station, Oliver leading her over to an idling town car. “Thea wanted to come and greet you as well, but she can be a bit much sometimes…”

“I would’ve loved to have seen Thea,” Felicity interrupted him as the car was pulled back into traffic, it probably wouldn’t have been so tense. “I can’t believe she’s nineteen now.”

“She used to ask about you a lot when I first came back home,” Oliver admitted. “I never knew what to say. She lit up when she heard about the…the arrangement.”

Thirteen year old Thea had idolised her brother during her one summer trip to Boston when Felicity and Oliver had been dating, and the young girl had loved Felicity almost instantly, apparently being a good influence on her brother. They’d had a lot of late night girl talks where Thea had admitted a lot to Felicity while she did her best to give some reassuring advice while they pigged out on pints of mint choc chip ice cream. Felicity had thought about Thea a lot when she’d first moved to Central City, hoping that her disappearance wouldn’t be taken too hard by her. 

“And what does she think of everything?” Felicity picked at a piece of thread on her skirt to avoid looking at Oliver.

“She’s angry. At me.” He was quick to clarify that. “Angry that I didn’t tell her that we’d gotten married to begin with. Angry that I destroyed everything.”

Felicity pursed her lips, not sure how she wanted to answer that last part, when the car began to slow and she looked out her window. “Where are we?” 

“My apartment.” Their driver opened Felicity’s door and helped her climb out as Oliver slid across the seat, sending his crutches out the open door first. “Our apartment.” He amended to Felicity’s growing horror. 

“Our…Our apartment?” Felicity stammered, the concept making complete sense but one that had never actually crossed Felicity’s mind before now. She had imagined in this crazy new reality that she’d actually get her own living space.

“We’re meant to be a reuniting couple,” Oliver reminded her. “My mother has this all mapped out. My roommates overseas at the moment so you can take her room, I’m not going to force you into anything like that.” Felicity nodded automatically as they made their way into the foyer, she took a couple of deep breaths to calm herself down. 

“This will get easier.” Oliver promised, but Felicity had her doubts. They made their way into the apartment, Felicity dropping the suitcases she’d been dragging behind her as they crossed the threshold. “I can make you something to eat if you’re hungry?” Oliver suggested, hopping his way across the open living area of the apartment towards the kitchen. 

Felicity shook her head, she’d been wise enough to buy her own dinner before boarding the train. “Just a shower and then bed, I can never sleep while travelling.” 

“I remember,” Oliver reminded her, pointing out the way to the bathroom, as well as her bedroom. Before she could disappear behind locked doors for the night, Oliver’s arms wrapped around Felicity’s shoulders and he felt her fall into the embrace, even if it was only the slightest of movements, and brushed his lips across her cheek briefly before she took several sudden steps back. 

“Good night,” she rushed out, before rushing into the bathroom, the sound of the door closing reverberating through the quiet apartment.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Her smile was an image he never wanted to erase from his mind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been... almost four months since I last updated? Holy crap. I was going to blame the start of Uni, but the whole blame can't lie there. I'm just horrible at concentrating sometimes. This chapter has been sitting on the same paragraph for that whole time, and I couldn't get anywhere with it even though I knew what was happening in my mind. That's always the way, isn't it. 
> 
> Anyway, the release of certain spoilers, definitely got my inspiration back.

 

The smell of freshly brewed coffee drew Felicity out of the comfort of her bedroom the next morning, a fluffy white dressing gown she had found in the wardrobe wrapped tightly around her. 

“Thank you,” she murmured sleepily as Oliver, sitting at the counter already dressed for the day, wordlessly handed her a cup. 

“My mother wants to see us today,” he let her finish half the cup before he spoke again, and she tried to not let her grimace be too obvious. She had never been great at concealing her emotions, though. “She wants everyone to meet for lunch at Tony’s here in the city.”

A million excuses ran through Felicity’s head, meeting with the matriarchal Queen was not on her list of activities to do, well, ever, but the woman had the power to make the next six months in Starling City as miserable as possible. She nodded reluctantly. 

“It won’t be so bad,” Oliver added after their coffees had been finished, just before she went to go get dressed for the day and he turned back to his computer. She wasn’t sure if he was merely talking about lunch, or her time in Starling, but she wasn’t quite ready to believe him yet. 

Was it cruel, making Felicity come to Starling City? Oh, Oliver could argue the technicalities behind it, that it had been his mother who had issued the ultimatum and arranged the job that left her no choice, but he had done nothing to stop her. Waking up in that hospital bed _again_ , he thought the medications had given him hallucinations when it was Felicity that came into focus.

He still remembered, though, arriving home that day to find more than half the closet empty, and her signature on divorce papers on the counter. They had fought the night before, but it had only been a minor disagreement, and Oliver had left to give them both some space, never imagining that it would end up with his wife gone. He never admitted to anyone how much time he had spent really missing her, and hoping she would come back one day. To have her reappear was something he had long stopped thinking about.  


That afternoon, walking through the doors of the crowded, popular restaurant, Oliver admired Felicity’s courage as she faced the whole event with a smile crossing her face. As Felicity slid into the empty chair next to Thea, the young girls face lighting up as they immediately began catching up, Oliver didn’t miss his mother’s eyes looking over Felicity’s left hand, her eyes narrowing at the bare fingers, before glaring at Oliver. Moira had organised everything to achieve maximum publicity, and they weren’t playing by her rules.

“Are you settling in nicely?” It was the first direct conversation Moira made to Felicity, as the last of their lunch plates were whisked away, before coffee was brought out. Felicity’s smile dimmed slightly, something that Oliver picked up on, but she still managed to reply that so far everything was okay. 

“I’ll be very glad to start at work on Monday,” she added. Anything to get out of the apartment. 

Moira opened her mouth again, her eyes again focused on Felicity’s bare left hand, and quickly Oliver changed the subject to avoid any more tension that this lunch could possibly bring. 

~

Moira had excused them all to make their swift escapes after coffee had been drunk as quickly as possible, and after Felicity and Thea made plans to catch up again during the week, Oliver followed Felicity out of the restaurant, leaning heavily on his crutches as they waited for the car on the edge of the sidewalk. 

“It’s so good to see Thea again,” Felicity gave him a bright smile, as the car pulled up and he leaned forward to open the door. “I can’t believe how much she’s grown up.”

His lips parted slightly, a remark already forming that she would have been able to see Thea all the time the last five years under different circumstances, but the ghost of her laughter from lunch had him keeping quiet. He didn’t want tense Felicity back after he had seen her acting so happy earlier. “I need to check on my club,” he spoke instead as Felicity helped him arrange the crutches on the floor at their feet. “Do you want to come and check out the place?” 

Felicity was staring at something out on the street, and for a long moment he thought that she would refuse, go back to the apartment, and retreat behind a locked bedroom door again. Thankfully, she nodded. 

The car ride was long, attempts at conversation one sided and stilted, which was such a strange contrast to the bubbling chatter from lunch. 

“Welcome to Verdant,” Oliver swung onto the main floor of the club, ten minutes later. He was happy that he got to show Felicity his accomplishments, so long after he first thought about one day owning his own club. 

“You did all this?” Felicity turned in a circle, taking everything slowly in. She was in awe. When she and Oliver had first met, he was night managing a bar near campus, and it was on one of their first dates that he talked about one day owning his own club. 

“I promise this won’t take long,” he was already heading towards the door leading out to the supply room. “I just need to talk with my supplier, who she be here any moment with the delivery.”

He disappeared out the back, and Felicity sat down on a bar stool, taking the free time to reply to an email that her friend Iris had sent through. She had been on assignment out of Central City for the last couple of weeks, and had missed all the drama of Felicity’s announcement and departure. She was demanding a visit as soon as possible, and all the drama that she couldn’t believe the blonde had left out on. 

She was halfway through tapping out the message, when her name was called out, echoing through the large space. 

“Felicity Smoak, here in person.” Tommy Merlyn approached her from across the empty floor, seemingly coming from one of the back offices. “Or is it Felicity Queen? I never thought I would see this day.” He stopped several feet away from her, his arms across his chest. Tommy was one of the only people within Oliver's small circle of friends, possibly the only one living in Starling City, that knew about his and Felicity’s history. He had been there in Vegas with them that weekend, never turning down an opportunity for a weekend in Sin City, he had acted as their witness.

The smile tugging at the corner of Tommy’s lips, he was trying really hard not to look happy to see her, had Felicity smiling, and standing up with her arms outstretched for a hug. “It’s really good to see you again Tommy,” she promised him. 

“You weren’t meant to leave him you know,” he admonished her when they broke apart. “You were really good for him.”

“But he wasn’t good for me,” Felicity countered quickly. She didn’t want to get pulled into a game of blame so quickly, changing the subject. “What have you been up to? I bet you have a lot of wild stories.”

Tommy shrugged. “I’m managing this place with Oliver at the moment. I’ve got a girlfriend too, it’s serious.” That was so far from the Tommy she had known, and she couldn’t be happier for him.

“That’s great,” she squealed reaching in for another hug. “We’ll have to all get together soon.”

Tommy stayed with her, the two of them making small talk until Oliver reappeared, his issues with the supplier solved. He was happy to see Felicity smiling again, happy that she wasn’t completely bitter about their past when surrounded by his friends and family. Her smile was an image he never wanted to erase from his mind. 

~

“We need to talk about something,” Oliver spoke up as they finished the last of their takeout Chinese from the comfort of the couches in the privacy of the apartment. He knew he had to bring up the topic of her rings before it was brought up by his mother. He was hoping he could approach the subject a little more delicate and tactfully. An eyebrow rose in question, and he took it as a cue to continue. “Your ring…” 

Felicity tensed immediately. The ring was still in her bag, secreted away in a small compartment where it was safe, and out of sight. “No.” Her reply was soft but firm. 

“Felicity…”

“No. I don’t care what you’re about to say Oliver, I don’t care what your mother is going to say either. I’m not wearing that ring right now.” 

The wall between them was up again.

 


End file.
